Without warning, he was pounced on by a strange creature he'd never seen before.
The creature quickly overpowered him, stripped him and sank his fangs into the cyclist's groin.
In seconds the creature had taken what it needed and left the cyclist for dead.
Soon an army officer appeared, in full combat fatigues and gas mask.
The officer found the cyclist was still alive, but immediately handcuffed him.
The cyclist regained consciousness, then asked the officer, "Why have you handcuffed me?"
The officer said, "Sorry but I'm out looking for an escaped... creature. It's the result of some experimentation at the army base, but it was never supposed to break out. It looks like it may have attacked you, and we can't take any chances so I'm going to have to take you to the base. It's for your own safety."
The cyclist was marched to the army base. There, he was put into a straitjacket.
The officer said, "We don't know what's going to happen to you if you've been attacked by the creature, and we can't take any risks so we'll have to keep you in isolation here until the doctor can see you."
He lay in the cage, cuffed and uncomfortable, waiting to find out what his future may be.
Finally, after three hours, someone arrived.
The doctor said, "Sorry about the biohazard suit, but the creature that attacked you has certain... abilities that may prove dangerous to you and anyone you come into contact with, depending on what he did to you."
"I'll let you out now, but I need to take a few further precautions."
After tying up the cyclist, the doctor asked, "So, what did he do to you?"
The cyclist replied, "I'm not sure, but it went straight for my... groin."
The doctor said, "Oh dear. Did you feel any strange sensation?"
"Yes, it was sort of... orgasmic!"
"I was afraid of that. He may have infected you in a way which is harmless to you - well, to most of you, but it's made your penis very dangerous. Any contact with it by you or anyone else could be lethal."
The cyclist cried, "My God! Is there anything you can do"
"Well, there's always amputation... but there is an alternative. We can use what we call a 'containment appliance'. It will fit over your penis and will have to remain there until we can take some samples and run some tests to find out if you are infected or not. Unfortunately that takes 7 years."
The doctor continued, "There, just come back in 7 years and we'll be able to run the tests. It shouldn't affect your life too much. Of course, you won't be able to have sex or masturbate. But let's hope we'll find in 7 years that you get the 'all clear'."
Once the doctor had secured the appliance, he released the cyclist.
The doctor said, "You do learn to adapt. I have only 5 years to go before my test."
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